Over the past few days, with Cutezilla teething pretty badly, I have on numerous occasions cursed the legal community for their position that tranquilizer guns should not be used on young children. Well, up until I had a moment of realization. The scenario went a little something like this:
CUTEZILLA, halfway through her third hour of screaming: "WAAAAAAHHHH!!! WHAAH!!!! WHAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!"
HUBBY: "What is it, sweetheart? Do you want a cracker? How about some milk?"
CUTEZILLA: "WAAAAHHH!!! WHAAH!!!! WHAAH!!!! WHAAAHHH!!!"
HUBBY: "Yogurt? Cheese? Juice???"
CUTEZILLA: "WAAAAHHH!!! WHAAH!!!! WHAAH!!!! WHAAAHHH!!!"
HUBBY: "Are you tired? Are you hungry? What do you want? TV? American Idol???"
CUTEZILLA: "WAAAAHHH!!! WHAAH!!!! WHAAH!!!! WHAAAHHH!!!"
HUBBY: "ARGH!!!!?! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!"
THUMP THUMP THUMP!
CUTEZILLA: "WHAAA...Whaahh..wha....zzzzzz....."
HUBBY: "Oh thank God. Finally some silen--"
WIFEY, Entering: "Honey? Did you go through the mail yet? I've asked you four times to look at this bill, now, and it's still here, exactly where I left it for you the last time I mentioned it. Is that my gym ID on the bureau??? Did you put it there??? I've been looking for this thing for a month now--"
HUBBY'S EYE TWITCHES.
WIFEY: "How many times have I told you not to move my stuff!!?! I can't find anything when you--"
HUBBY: "ARGH!!!!?! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!"
THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP!
WIFEY: "Was that a tranq gun??? Where the hell did... did you... get a... zzzzz...."
HUBBY: "Oh thank God. Finally some silence."
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